Sunday, 5 May 2013

Another year older - part 1

I turned 40  (gasp horror)… back in December.

A milestone for everyone when they get there but a real milestone for someone who wasn’t supposed to be alive.  I give thanks to God for these 40 years. 
I haven’t always had things go the way I would like.  In fact often I wondered how things could go any worse at times!  But here we are.  Lots of learning has happened.  Lots of friendships formed, Lots of life experiences in that time, and lots of loss. 

Anyway.. I am not about making a deep and meaningful post to be honest.  I just wanted to post some pictures of the 40th celebrations, despite burying my darling Dad just 5 days before.  We made an effort to carry on, as we know what Dad was like and how he would have HATED everything to stop because he had gone.  In fact the day before he died, he was still saying that if he couldn’t make it, we were to still have the party… we were to still celebrate.  (not thinking that by “couldn’t make it” that could mean “not be alive”).  It was all pretty surreal actually.

So, Wednesday the 12th of December was the day.  I woke up, still in Kaitaia at my Mums place… her, my kids and I (hubby was back in Whangarei for work)…… and the instant I woke up was the heaviness once again that my Dad wasn’t there, my first birthday ever without him.  suck!
But the kids excitement over my birthday soon took over. They were clambering onto the bed for cuddles and kisses and pressie exchanges…… and how can you continue to be down when it’s like that.  My Mummy was here,  she was giving me extra loves, making up for my Dads absence…

We spent the day as we had the previous week … sitting around together, reflecting, remembering etc..  and then later on in the evening I was blessed with all the whanau coming around to have dinner with me.  It wasn’t at all planned, as we were going to have a bit of a get together back home in Whangarei when I went home on the weekend…. So to have whanau come and celebrate with me was lovely.  Of course there were tears, how could you not have tears when we’d just worked through the hardest time of our lives …….and saying goodbye to our Dad??
But there were also many laughs, FOOD… and much much Love there that night.  We just blobbed around.. It was a very laid back and lovely evening.

Awesome family time <
My Sis in Law Aveena



Cuz Charles over from Perth for Dads funeral, <3

Cuz Cally, Uncle Ron, Mum, Avee, Aunty Elma and Aunty Didee chatting

Aunty Chick - Dads sister

Birthday flowers

Kendyls self portrait



Mums big bro first to arrive, catching up over a beer/wine.
Mum and I with Uncle Wayne.  Kendyl took this pic
My birthday glass and bevvy

Uncle Wayne and Kendyl before the others arrived.


  1. You are AMAZING .... Love you beautiful lady xx

  2. This is a time that your children will look back on and be so proud of you. That even when there is so much grief, there is also time for love and joy and creating new memories, of moving forward but never forgetting. Hugs to you and your family. I'm part of the 40 plus club too now and its not so bad... :)

  3. I'm so glad you did celebrate your 40th. Such a special milestone.
    Don't you think that there is a different peace that comes over something like a family gathering when it is in those early days of having just lost someone so special. We felt it in the gathering just after Dad's funeral where only his kids got together (and the kids/spouses of his kids).... but also that first Christmas.
    It's an encouraging peace. The one that says "it's ok.".

    Much love to you as you look back and reflect xx

    1. Oh definitely mate...that summed it up perfectly!! :) ((hugs)) xxx

  4. Tough time for glad special memories were still created for you. xx

  5. What an awesome whanau you have, your dad's memory will always be carried through in all your special gatherings. Way to go Neetz!


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